BDSM Terms 101 : Part 3
- ambrosiaswisdom
- Sep 22, 2014
- 3 min read
There is a distinct difference between the way different people view labels. This is common place because no 2 people are the same so the same label will strike a different cord in a different way. That being said, I am going to be going into MY opinion of a few labels and what they mean to ME. If you view a label differently, please try and step back from your view point and look at things from mine before you comment. This post is ALL terms which can be viewed difeerently by different people.
D/S: I am probably going to get a few people cranky by my using capitals for both of them, but is the Dom/me really above the Sub, or are they truly equals that are choosing to give/take control?
M/s: Master/slave, yes I am using the lower case for slave because of my views of the dynamic.
Switch: Someone who can, either by choice or by situation, be either a D/M/Top/Sadist, or a S/s/bottom/Maso. Certain things will trigger a rapid change between one state and another, while others are more subtle and take time or specific people or situations.
Sub: The party who gives up control to another for a certain amount of time, be it during a scene, or an entire relationship. While they are giving up control of the situation, they retain the ability to have some say over what is going on and when to end things. Should the Sub call an end to something that is their right and choice, and is to be respected and (by a proper Dom/me) carried out. The mindset (at least for me) is "it feels good and they want it so I will do it. If it doesn't feel good or isn't something I want to do, I can say NO".
Slave: This is going to be another one that will bug people. My view is that a slave takes their pleasure from knowing that it is what their Master/Mistress wants. It may not be something the slave likes or would do by choice, but they will still do it because it is asked of them. They are there to serve and to fulfill a need/desire/fantasy of their Master/Mistress. The mindset of the slave (in my opinion) is "Master/Mistress wants it, so I will do it".
Master/Mistress: A good Master or Mistress will take into consideration the needs, wants, desires, and likes/dislikes of the slave. While they may ask the slave to do something that doesn't fit in with this they are fully aware of the fact that it will be 100% for the M and will normally do something for the slave after. Hard limits should still respected and not crossed.
Dom/me: Like a Master/Mistress but not to the full extreme. A good one will not expect a Sub to do something if they don't truly want to do it. They will listen to the wants/desires of the Sub and take them into consideration and then respect the boundaries that may be put on things at that moment that are not a hard limit.
Sado: Sadist... someone who enjoys inflicting pain for whatever reason be it physical, sexual or mental/emotional.
Maso: Masochist... someone who enjoys receiving pain for whatever reason be it physical, sexual or mental/emotional.
These, and the past 2 posts, are just the basic terms that you will hear me use and MY views on them. There will be other terms which I may not use all the time, but you should still come to know. I will be adding more posts as more terms are used and become important for you to know. Check out my other posts dedicated to termonology if you have not yet.
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